Fat and Proud

Well not really proud to be overweight but it really gets to me when people bash other people that are overweight. It just makes me want to wish them fat! I know that is not a nice thing when I hate being this way by self but some people really have nerve. After I have this baby my OB has already said that he wants to do some testing to see if I have PSOC and do a blood sugar testing to see if I am borderline diabetic. He has there is a med that can help with my weight loss. I have to live a healthy life for my kids so that they have a good example. I have tried weight watchers many times and had just signed up for a site that was free but works for a lot of people and then I found out I was pregnant and I have not signed on to the site since. but I have managed to lose 5 lbs and I am still at 5lbs less than when I found out I was pregnant and tomorrow I will be 17 weeks. Wow I can not believe how the time is flying by! With DS it did not seem like it went by so fast. I kinda hope it slows down a bit. well I guess I'm going to sign off for the night and try and get to sleep. been sitting in bed for over an hour with the laptop out... I miss the hubs so much. Only 2 more wake ups!!!! =)

Lonely

Laying in bed, eating Sugar Babies. Thinking about the hubs that is thousands of miles away right now and will not be back til late Saturday. This week stinks, well for me it does. He is in Mexico building houses for people that need them badly with a group of people from our church. It seems that just last week he was away at Joplin. But so much different since the only way we can communicate is through Facebook messages and comments. So manly memories of him and I have been on my mind. From first date, to breaking up a few times , to moving out of his house once and thinking it was over for good. My life at once seemed to be upside down. Then it all changed we were back together with in months and planning our wedding. I then found out we were expecting a LO and were not even married yet. And here we are a bit over 2 years married and we are expecting our second child. I NEVER pictured my life being this way. I am a SAHM, selling Pampered Chef on the side and working PT(oncall) for my old job. I feel so fortunate to be able to be at home with our DS. I love our snuggle time in the morning after he eats his breakfast. And this week those tight hugs are much needed with the hubs out of the country! I can not wait to pick him up at the airport! I told him that I will have his favorite brownies with me and maybe even a starbucks coffee. I know DS will be so happy to see him. He has been walking around the house calling out for his Daddy. Its very sweet but bittersweet at the same time. Good news is that our gender ultrasound is set for Aug 18th!! I have a strong feeling his baby is a girl. I would be happy with either sex but I just kinda feel it in my gut.
Well I am going to try to fall asleep and dream that the hubs sends me a message on facebook tonight.

A little late....

in many ways! I wanted to post this a few days ago but I am just getting around to it. We are expecting again! =) I took a test and ran off to carters to get DS a new shirt to be able to tell DH that he was gonna be a daddy again!!!

My DH and are extremely happy and excited about having two kids together! He has kids from previous.

I am just having a hard time emotional with this pregnancy.

My fitness pal

Two days straight using my fitness pal and I am loving it! I hope to see some result very soon. It is a very easy tool to use and I am eating the foods I love just portion control. I defiantly recommend everyone to use the site. And they have an app too if you have a smart phone, which I do not. But when I can get an upgrade I will be taking advantage of the app! Yesterday the LO and I went on a walk to the post off ice and around the town as well. He really enjoyed to time out of the house and I needed the walking.  Hope for that to become a norm for us.

Changes in my life and phobias

I fear ducks, having a vehicle accident, birds, having another miscarriage, flying in a plane, Austin running out into the road and so many other things. Many thats you can not control in your life but one thing I know that I am in control of is my weight. I was a cute size 9 or so when I was a Junior in HS and then I do not know what happened my Senior year. I have yo-yo'd so much since then. Before having DS I was down to a size 14 and I don't even want to reveal what size I am now. I am so tired of being fat and me being uncomfortable in my own body taking over my life! After reading This blog post from the great Blair , I decided I needed to put something in writing!! I have always wanted to have sexy pics done of my self to give to DH for his birthday or something and I even have the photographer picked out that will take them for me! But that will not happen anytime with my body looking the way it does now. I have to make a plan. I have to pray for the strength.

SO done!

I am really feeling done with my job today. the new person should be starting soon and then I am FREE!! to be a stay at home momma or find something else!

Weekend recap

WOW what a busy weekend. Time at the ball fields on Saturday with an afternoon of shopping and Panera for dinner! YUM! Easter Sunday with Austin's 1st Easter egg hunt. Which he did very good with and caught on real quick that he needed to pick the eggs up and put them in his basket. Then he thought it was funny to throw the eggs around the yard! Now that was a hoot. The weekend ended and the hubs we to work at 5 am. I always call him as soon as we get up and Austin is eating his breakfast and he tells me that he had forgotten that he had taken this week of vacation. WOOOHOOO Daddy will be home for the week. If defiantly a change to have him home during the day. somewhatnice    We were out on the deck last night and he is terrified of wasp and hornet and he was saying something about a wasp and I then told me " oh yeah, that reminds me" He then starts flipping out asking where it is. LOL o-h  m-y g-o-o-d-n-e-s-s. that was too funny I had seen where there was a nest right by the back door. He finds the bug spray and I am about to walk back inside the house. He looked at me and said " You are not leaving me out here!!!" I love my man so much! =) I will try and post some pics that I took over the weekend tomorrow.

I feel horrible!

I feel like such a bad person for not keeping up with my blog and so many things have changed in just a short time! I used to be a full time momma and work full time. Til the hubs asked me one day when he came by my work if I would please put my two weeks notice in. I toyed with the idea for some time and finally had the nerve to do it. I hated being about from home for such long hours and it was really taking a toll on my relationship with my husband as well. As of right now I am still working at the same job but only working part time til my replacement is hired and trained. Well the first part has already happened now my replacement needs to start working and then be trained for like a month, and then I will not be working. I thought it would be such a change for me with not having " my money" but with making cakes on the side for friends it has really helped out with that. I have not had to " ask " the hubs for money and I am still being the fugal person that I am with grocery shopping and such. I am still managing to pay our cell bill as well. I am def going to make a better effort to keep up with my blog and the happening of my boy!! gosh he is growing way too fast!! He will be 18 months next month! His favorite words are "NO" and "MOMMA" . I love to hear him call for me! He is the sweetest and if you ask for a kiss, he kisses you on throws his hand to his mouth to blow kisses. =) that is it for now.